News Flash: This Coalition Is A Joke

I'm absorbing Question Time reluctantly and all it's (predictably, these days) generating in me is an intensifying mood of futility, especially after the pathetic Clegg/Cameron long grass double act earlier today. This 'strong and stable government' nonsense is a dangerous misunderstanding on the part, particularly, of the Tories of what the general election result really meant.

People have had a bellyful of 'strong and stable governments' that are basically all mendacious mouth and no trousers, having had 13 years of a catastrophic version of 'strong and stable' Labour government. We're through with elected dictatorships when they're actually elected. But this increasingly disconnected, disingenuous, dysfunctional Libdum/Tory stitch-up version of a 'strong and stable government' certainly wasn't voted for - by anyone! It's the wittiest form of 'strong and stable government' I think I've ever seen. And the joke's on us.

People, if anything can be read into the outcome of the general election (and not a lot can), did not vote for a 'strong and stable government' that would carry on for five years as if Cameron's and Clegg's convenient interpretation was the only one that mattered. What people actually 'voted for' (if a mass ballot really can have a mind and character of its own, which itself borders on insulting inanity) is a weak and unstable government that would have to make policy according to principle, be answerable to the people every day of its existence, and would have to rely on pure guts and political nous just to get through one parliament.

A minority Tory government would have delivered that, and would have shown the country that the party still had a soul and some real courage. It would have earned them a proper victory down the line, too, possibly with a new leader who genuinely represented those erstwhile traits of the Conservative institution.

As it is, forget what I've said before, (although I've been pretty consistent in the post-election propaganda landscape), the middle class Richmond/Notting Hill shits are in charge again (this time with a bluish-yellow hue rather than a red one). They've welded Parliament's doors shut to the likes of me and you, and are now talking to themselves while really, honestly imagining, laughably, that they are running the country.

It did not take long, but the consequences, as the world economy tanks - this time for real - will be awe-inspiring and devastating. We could have had a weak but principled and determined government. Instead, we don't even have a 'strong and stable government'. All we really have is weakness, fudge, paralysis and hot air.

Not impressed. Plus ca change, right?

Griffin's Last Word

Or should that be David Dimbleby's, who seems to love the sound of his own voice more than everyone else's?

What a pathetic bloody spectacle that was.

That's it for the gargoyles on this blog - unless the Labourists try any more anti-Tory false association smears, of course.

Hat tip: DT blogs.

Classic Starkey

David Starkey is the only person who's articulating what we all know - that Gordon Brown is responsible for both the crash and for creating the City culture, complete with the weak regime of regulation (Brown's personal creation), which encouraged bankers to ignore risk. As long as Brown was getting tax revenue from this giant, debt-fueled scam, he was happy - and happy to piss all that revenue away mercilessly on things (everything) that he had no idea how to manage. He's pissed away our future, in other words - and worse, he's pissed it away having already sold the collatoral.

But there's more. Combine this with the Brown-inspired bonus bonanza that reinforced the irresponsibility, thus keeping the whole madness spinning, and what you're left with is the perfect recipe for a total crash.

It's Gordon Brown's recipe - and it's come out perfectly: total collapse of the entire system; the destruction of Britain's financial and economic stability. Cheers, Gordon.

And now he's printing money to keep his high going! The lunatic needs to be stopped.

So I do hope the Tories will hammer these particular nails home. Brown thoroughly deserves it. (But so - in a slightly different way - do we.)

Whatever happens, if the Tories fail, then so do we. It's that dire.

But hey, thank God for Starkey!

Crooked Beard, Dodgy Bloke

Jim Knight is on Question Time tonight. Here's his BBC publicity shot. Beard looks a bit weird, doesn't it? This clown is the Labour MP for Dorset South and minister for something-or-other (employment) who's a serial trougher who said his exorbitant second home and expenses claims were 'reasonable'. This is how his own local rag, the Dorset Echo, reported it at the time:

Mr Knight claimed £12,541.69 in mortgage interest payments last year for a one-bedroom flat in Vauxhall that he has owned for more than two years. He also claimed £3,395 for food and £2,290.85 for maintenance as well as sums to cover telephone bills, cleaning services and utility and Council Tax payments. His total additional cost allowance claim came to just over £21,363 last year – the maximum allowance being £23,083. Mr Knight said he is in favour of a total overhaul of the way in which MPs’ salaries and expenses are set, adding that members should have no say at all in what they earn. He said: “It’s important to be transparent and I decided, pro-actively, to publish my expenses.

Maybe so, but this asshole's just said on Question Time that he doesn't think he should have to pay any of this cash back and that Cameron is an 'opportunist' for forcing his MPs to do it. He doesn't seem to be getting much sympathy from the audience, one of whom, rightly, said that until there are prosecutions, no restoration of trust is possible.

Crooked beard; dodgy bloke: why not start with Jim tosspot Knight?

The Cameron Show

Slightly busy as I somewhat am at present, I've been a bit off the pace with events-political over the past few days. So imagine my surprise listening to PM in the car on the way home that Big Dave Cameron's Tories had, to use the expression of the programme, 'scored an own goal' by talking about cutting government spending. Surely not, thought I. Isn't it the case that both serious parties are planning cuts? Did my ears deceive me when Alistair Darling mentioned that he had cut spending just after the budget a few months ago? Didn't Fraser Nelson reveal the extent of those cuts - 7% wasn't it?

But no. These aren't cuts at all. In Brown's fantasy world of endless zeroes, by some, astonishing feat of mental gymnastics, this is 'investment'. Apparently, Tory realism and proposals for managing the decline in national output (Brown's bust) are 'massive Tory cuts in essential public services' while Labour's piecemeal fiddling around with shortfalls enforced upon them because they've run out of our money (they've even run out of borrowed money - now they're running out of printed money) aren't cuts at all. That's 'investment' in la la land.

I watched the exchanges between Brown and Cameron a few minutes ago on the interweb. Cameron wiped the floor with his delusional, monocular, has-been opponent. Why, then, does the media appear to think otherwise? I have to assume it's just blind prejudice. It was refreshing, therefore, to discover that I am not alone in my assessment of Cameron's performance. Lloyd Evans (solid name, that) thought so too:

Cameron stood up with a ready-made quip. ‘How pleased I am to see the prime minister in his place.’ Brown shrank physically at this, staring obsessively into his lap like an anxious schoolboy trying to magic himself out of danger.

Cameron explained that the Tories support the existing electoral system, ‘because you can throw out weak, tired and discredited governments.’ He asked if the prime minister planned to hold a referendum before the general election. Brown had flicked the switch by now, restoring himself to Gladstonian mode. He welcomed Cameron’s decision to discuss the issues and added sorrowfully, ‘there seems to be an element of self-interest in the way he is discussing policy.’ This brought the house down. Even the Tory whips joined in. So did the Speaker. ‘Tew noisy!’ he bawled which prompted more catcalls. He swivelled his massive pink trunk towards the Tories. ‘And I’m not getting much help from the chief whup!’

Cameron poured scorn on Brown’s apparent opportunism, calling it an attempt ‘to fix the rules before the next election.’ Brown flayed uselessly with the accusation that the Tories planned 10 percent cuts across the board and Cameron was withering in reply, calling Brown’s government ‘the worst in history’ whose ultimate legacy would be the mismanagement of public finances. This cheered Brown up. He unsheathed the most perilous weapon in his armoury. Tedium. ‘Let me read the figures for public spending,’ he said and reeled them off from memory. By the time he’d finished, my keyboard was smoking. Brown can hype faster than I can type. As an ultra-boring finale he repeated his mantra that the Tories’ only policy is to do nothing. This was more a skirmish than a full-blooded battle and I have a suspicion Cameron was expecting to face the Postman today not the Presbyterian.

That's what I thought I saw. The only problem I thought Cameron might have was deciding which bit of Brown he should stomp-on next. Or, as Evans the Blog puts it:

Cameron’s real problem is that the PM is now so weak he could barely put up a fight against Andy Pandy. How do you discredit an opponent whose friends can’t credit him? How do you finish off a man who is finished? How do you ridicule ridicule itself? He mustn’t make it look too easy and Cameron struck the right notes today. Anger, impatience, mockery – and a bit more anger. Exactly.

Exactly. From now on, folks, it's The Cameron Show all the way. Brown? Ignore 'im.

Update:
According to Fraser Nelson, the true Labour spending cuts have been revealed - inadvertently - by Andy Burnham on C4 news. You can read his piece here. John snow summed it up neatly in a question:

"There is no one who doesn't know the parlous condition of our finances. We have borrowed five times our own GDP. It beggars belief that there are not going to be swingeing cuts and all sorts of alteration to taxes to pay for that. How otherwise are we ever going to plug the hole in our finances? Surely what the Tories are doing is telling the truth - and what you're doing is trying to disguise it?"

The truth will out.

Can I Believe My Ears?

==Question Time Bombshell==

Watch it if you get a chance because hardly had the music stopped than William Hague said - I think - that Douglas Hogg and the others might well have to face criminal prosecution. He then got a round of applause for saying the misuse of expenses could well be fraud. Um...I think he's still gonna get grilled, though. But full marks for effort, William my boy.

Ben Bradshaw's turn. He looks petrified.

=Update=
Well, maybe not petrified. But he sounds like a whining schoolboy ('It wasn't meee'). The audience responses are interesting: huge, spontaneous applause for the calls from Hague and Cable for a General Election and for the UKIP treasurer, Andersen who asked who signed-off on all this (dovetailing it neatly with Europe). Powerful response to that. UKIP could have really broken through in middle England. Tories beware June 4th! (By the same token, Labour has lost the ear of the public - utterly. They're in real, big, deep poop. Every cloud...).

Martin Bell sounds more and more like the boring old fart he really is. And he's just said he's gonna stand again. Oh dear God.

=Update 2=
The piece that'll be played on the news: Bradshaw mercilessly handbagged by an articulate woman who said, to great applause, "Brown: your time's UP". That's the message in the proverbial nutshell. Pure, simple and shattering, and nothing slippery mouthpieces like Bradshaw say can alter that. Job done.